I though they will come and carry
me to the place where they had plan to drown me and this is how my HOLI will
start but as it always happens reality was something else. They stayed down
stairs and kept on playing with their mobile. I went to them and asked if they
would like to have tea. As usual they kept themselves busy with the mobile. After a while we had breakfast. Then I went
up stairs and put some oil in my hair, cream in my exposed skin and came down
with my hair band, which was made up of cloth and bought in Thamel with my some
crazy friends. Gurung looked at me in a weird way when I sat with them setting
my hair band. Now it was his turn to go up stairs and get himself ready I
guess. Suddenly, Bahun came to me and ask to come out of the shop. Sorry, I
forgot to tell that I was new to the place and as my rented room was not still
ready to shift I was staying in Gurung’s room, he was so nice to stay with his
friends and letting me stay in his room but it was already been five days. And
few people expressed their dislike of me staying for such a long, which
obviously made me feel sad but that became a push factor for me to move out.
Anyways, Bahun forced me to come out, when I went he just put the power color
all over my face, wait he is not done, he put it in my neck and head as well,
then Kolkota did the same. What ?? I mean what a formal invitation was that? I
was very sure that it was a day of HOLI, the day to hide if not at least act to
hide in a room so that people will come and chaise you to pour water on you and
put color powder and hit balloons from far, leaving you to feel the terrible
pain especially when your skin is wet leaving red and blue marks in your body,
but wait …… there was nothing like that. We were only putting color powder with
decent invitations and with partial or full acceptance. It went only for a
while, when we were done with ourselves, they decided to go to visit their
friends as I was new I only had three friends Gurung, Bahun and Kolkota, well
the guy who studies in Kolkota hehehe ohhh how can I forget Bhudi baba, who got
this big belly like he is six months pregnant. They all started to call Madam
ji, a married school friend of them. Gurung plan to put the color powder with
surprise, but went fussss we had to go inside instead. She left her breakfast
and received the color and she also joints us to visit other friends. Boys took
bikes and we straight headed to meet Miss, an unmarried junior friend of
Kolkota. When we met her she attacked Gurung and tried to put the color powder
in his teeth….hmmmm nice try to take revenge of yesterday’s teasing.
Then we went for a bike ride.
People were enjoying with drink, colorful funny hats, masks and yes of course
the BHANG….girls even in shorts just like me, rooming like nothing and it was
really nothing, none of a girl got hit by painful water balloons, none of us
faced any kind of sexual, physical and
mental violence by the people on the road. Dude,,, I grew up all my life with a HOLI which
starts from a month earlier and it was/is a festival, which gives boys a
complete right to do violence on women/girls by hitting them water balloons no
matter where they are going for what job take it going to school, college, office…..or just
sitting on the outside stairs of the
house. A girl/woman is not supposed to face it and for boys it is a privilege, especially to enjoy
HOLI by violating women, like girls/women are object to enjoy their HOLI.
Women/girls starts to lock themselves inside the house because they are so sooo
threatened. It was never an only physical pain but more social, sexual and
mental harassment. It is an indicator
which shouts that women in our community are taken as a material to enjoy even
hurting them with painful water balloons or sexually harass by forcefully
putting the colors and touch/squeeze/ pinch in private parts. And the fact that
women/girls are suppose to keep their
mouth shut or hide themselves or let men/boys
do what they want and at the end after all violence, get scold and accused
of being over, crossing the limit and disobedient.
In these cases most of the
parents try to go with protectionist approach of gender equality. But these days,
little hope is rising as the police of Kathmandu valley have started to take
strict action against such violence but still its far cry to establish as a
gender friendly and violence free festival especially in Kathmandu valley,
which I was enjoying in this new place.
After a daylong celebration, end
up with great shower. Kathmandu valley should learn this from theTarai
districts. I must say till date it was a fearless HOLI in my whole life. Hope for this kind of fearless HOLI all over
the country.
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